How To Stop Worrying About The Future: 4 steps

TLDR of how to stop worrying about the future: 

1. Understand if it’s a normal amount of worry (do you worry too much?)
2. Identify what exactly you’re worried about.
3. Whether present, or prepare for the possible future problems (if they are likely)
4. Challenge your beliefs about the future worries (if they’re not likely)

Every time I see this question (how to stop worrying about the future?) I feel a little amused. 

No, not because I’m a heartless robot. 

After all, I and 12.5% percent of adults (in the US) age 18 and older experience regular feelings of worry, nervousness, or anxiety. (source: https://www.cdc.gov/nchs/fastats/mental-health.htm)

It’s unpleasant, sometimes painful.

But it’s because, by its very definition, worry is about the future. 

You can’t worry about the past.

Nobody has ever said: “I failed a test and now I worry about failing it again”. The past is in the past. It is known. It’s done.

You can’t worry about the present either: “I worry if I’m here”, “I worry if my hands are moving” – also impossible. 

So, worrying is always about the future, even if it’s related to what’s happening now or has happened in the past. 

So, what do you do if you find yourself worrying about the future?

First of all, you need to understand if your anxiety is natural. 

We all have anxiety. 

Some people have more. 

Some have less. 

Some anxieties are reasonable. Others are not. 

Anxiety is like food. 

Too little – and you are malnourished and sick. 

Too much – and you are overweight and sick. 

To identify your current level of anxiety, please refer to this article: 

50 shades of anxiety: How to identify and destroy yours?

Next, assuming your anxiety about the future is out of proportion (you worry too much and it interferes with your life), we then need to consider two possibilities: 

1. You have a chemical imbalance that makes you more prone to worrying. Some people have hormonal disbalances (e.g. thyroid) or deficiencies (e.g. iron) that need to be addressed. Ask a doctor to run these tests. 

If all comes up good and in balance, then…

2. You can identify what exactly you’re worried about. 

To do that, you will need a journal or a friend.

A journal is better, as it will listen endlessly, and wait patiently for you to gather your thoughts and express them in words. 

Journaling takes practice, but once you get used to being honest with yourself you will see how powerful it can be. 

You will be able to uncover your hidden fears.

Then you will be able to face them, one by one and defeat them.

In my course Outsmart Anxiety, I included journaling prompts and templates that will help you do just that. 

But you don’t need to get the course. 

Just ask yourself: 

1. What exactly am I worried about? 
2. And why is this important? What is the underlying reason?
3. What’s the worst that can happen?

E.g.

1. I’m worried I will lose my job (that I hate).
2. If I lose my job, I will not have money. If I don’t have money I will have to move out of my house. And if I have to move out, people will think I’m a failure.
3. And if I’m a failure, I will be lonely and nobody will protect me when I need help. 

So, let’s assume you’ve identified your core worry.

This is where worrying about the future comes from.

Next, you need to assess how likely it is. 

How likely is that outcome, that situation? 

50/50?

90% likely?

Let’s imagine that it’s likely. 

You hate the job.

The boss sees that and has talked about “possible options” if you don’t “improve”.

Then, you can decide, in your own mind, that this is what’s going to happen. 

No more ambiguity. No more “what ifs”.

Then you start preparing for that situation. 

I often say that action and worry can’t occupy the same head. 

If you act, you don’t worry. 

So, start preparing for the future situation.

You can use my MIST framework for problem-solving. 

Read more here: How to overcome anxiety with just 6 mental skills

But how to stop worrying about the future if the problem is not a real one?

Or maybe it’s extremely unlikely. 

Then, there are many techniques to overcome these thoughts.

I mention them here: Can’t Overcome Anxiety? Why Not Outsmart It Instead?

If you are really-really fed up with your anxiety you may even give exercise (body movement) a go. I show you how here: Want To Overcome Anxiety Forever? Rebuild your Resilience!

It will help you naturally get more control over your thoughts.

I used exercise to stop intrusive thoughts.

It’s like magic.